A much overdue post

A much overdue post

Guess what? It was a weird thing, regarding the chalet.

It was near afternoon, and as usual, I just woke up. Screwed internal clock, yeah. Woke up real late, had only about two hours to prepare. It was one of those moments when the resentment settles in. As expected I would have to "ask" to be allowed to go, however with the extent to stay over for a night somewhere other than home, wouldn't it be funny if you turned up to ask just on the day itself?

Well, yeah. That's what I did. I was sick inside, I didn't want to ask earlier. The responses were all the same. And when I did mention to Ma about the chalet, she'd gave the expected reaction of no overnight stays.

I left the house. No solid confirmation, no real idea what lies to happen later when the night end. As I sat in bus 21 to my destination my mind wandered as like the images which flowed past my eyes. The thoughts were a mess of paint on the canvas, it's like a messy art not seen beautiful in the artist's first strikes of his paint. Soon enough I arrived, and met the others: Vin, Ray, Cheryl, Nat, Boon, Weihao. Raine was a little late - Kelvin came shortly after I arrived. And then, I relaxed. The thoughts of Ma's telling to return home before the night ends was a far, far thought. We checked in, it was the chalet I recalled going to when I was eight or so. Maybe even younger. I remembered a bought Lego toyset. I had the Submarine Shark while my bro had the Crystals Harvester.

Anyways. The fun rolled after - minor slackage in the chalet, followed by bikes/roller-blades. Unfortunately because of the cash shortage I couldn't rent the blades. I can't blade anyway, I'm a frickkin' noob! Haha. On that later. Oh yeah. Before I forget, Eric was along with us. Haha. I knew there was a missing person there, above. Anyways, me, Vin, Nat, Kel, Cheryl, Eric took bikes; Hao, Boon, Ray, Raine took roller-blades. Poor Boon, his first time on blades XD We cycled around the park side, which was near the beach. A refreshing feel, being able to see the sea. I wanted to touch the sea, thought of swimming, but no one else intended to swim. Oh wells.

And after a little "leader goose" kinda biking/blading, I actually had a chance with the roller blades! It was neat. I remembered Rahmat teaching me how to stand. And that was it - and he'd said I had learnt fast, being able to stand with my first time trying. So here I am on the second, and I more or less know how to make simple forward maneuvers. Also many times I nearly fell, but once I was caught, the other I fell down forward - knees and arms bracing impact. I knew I would fall, and I just fell =P

After that event, Cheryl had to leave. Her Ma's birthday dinner. The rest of us retreated to the chalet, and the guys patched up the PS 2 and the laptops to the available television. Success, yeah V^___^ XD

Come nightfall. It was near the moment, and me and Ma had some conversation. Actually it was more of her telling me to come home. But I didn't. I stayed. Brood most of the moment. I talked to Vin about my problems, and I think in the end what he said made me stay. And it was my decision. My frickkin' decision. Damn the assumption of thinking that I had chosen my friends over family. THAT's bullshit. I chose to have an overnight somewhere else, and I see no wrong to that. I know I would behave responsibly and not ne a nuisance to public. I know I shall preserve my values as a Muslim and all (there was vodka but of course I didn't drink it. I did thought of it though, so that I'ld be drunk and let the drunkedness decide whether I would go home or not).

See, I couldn't say I would leave. Beause it was MY frickkin decision. And yet, there's this burning to tell me to go home. While that, my mind contended that what Ma said, it was like a frickkin' reverse psychology effect. Damn that. So I stayed. I did ask God to give me a sign. But I knew that God would want me to return. Because Ma said so.

Still, that's like an abuse of authority. Just because Ma says, I have to follow? Meh. Let that thought hang there. I don't want to debate now.

Anyways, I stayed. And me and Vin snucked to a walk. And we headed to the beach, because there's where I wanted to be. Vin did comment of the path we take, which resembles Spirited Away.

I guess he was right, in a sense.

We had a great chat. Over some stuff like the family thing. And the discussion of family BS and stuff. And Kingdom Hearts thingys, I think. Bad memory, haha. We even discussed of astronomy and such. I liked the conversation, haha. I was relaxing there, in the beach. The waves were calming. Downright. Lights off the neighbouring islands cast a pretty reflection against the waters. But the sea.

It was like, choking. The waves made me feel like walking in there, somewhat. There's a disturbing feeling that something is in the water, ready to grab and drag you to the deep depths.

Or maybe I'm reading too much Buffy. Haha.

Then I decided we should head back. When we returned to the chalet, Weihao commented "Wah lau, you two are like freaking gay,"

Basket. Haha. Of course we're not.

It was then the movies start. Haha. By then it was two or three in the morning - I guess most of us didn't have the intention to sleep. Silent Hill followed, after which X-Men III. They were great movies. The Silent Hill one made me think too, because it involved the stuff between mother and daughter. And that made me think of me and my Ma.

Damn. Haha. Was this a sign? I don't really know. Maybe.

But it was too late to head back home anyways. Taxi fare would explode.

So some of us watched the movie, and after X-Men III - which was around eight AM, everyone started napping. Haha. I tried to nap, but I couldn't. My right arm was like numb or something. Like the bones hurt because it was too cold. Coincidence? Or sign?

In the end, I ended up not sleeping at all. Haha.

We booked out at ten thirty. Did we have breakfast? I couldn't remember. I think no...

Then we departed. I headed home. Got on the bus, fell asleep for most of the ride back. When I reached my flat, there was that dreaded feeling in me again. Maybe Ma would scream me out of the house. Dad whacking me or something. And I was preparing myself for some kung-fu, literally. I unlocked the gate, and entered. When I passed by Ma, we didn't speak. Passed by Dad, he told me where the food was.

It was weird. No loud screams, no one-sided argument, no nothing. There was nothing. Just... nothing. It was disturbing. Yet... I don't know, it was a relief, maybe. I waited through the day to see if anything would happen. Some personal confrontation I don't want to be involved in. Maybe even a little whacking, I wouldn't be surprised.

But there was nothing. No reaction from the 'rents.

I couldn't remember much of what happened after that. Me and Ma are talking as usual, and she had not mentioned about the incident, nor my Dad.

Maybe, I should just thank God for this. Or maybe there is some dire punishment, in the grave. Or something. When it comes... yeah. *shrugs*

Seeya later guys.

Sayonara~