Thursday, March 29, 2007

With great power comes great responsibilities

With great power comes great responsibilities

I was reading a bit.

Personally I feel ashamed of myself.

Another side of me rationalized, simply put, in the same situation, I probably would not have placed in the same efforts as my comrades.

Where is my place in this?

Where in this entire arena, do I play my battles?

Do I matter to the children? Do I really matter?

All talk, no action. Eh? I contradict myself.

Looks like I have a decision to make.

More or less I've chosen what I really need.

Love to H.

Sayonara~

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 01:04
  Friday, March 23, 2007

Pride

Pride




























The corp I've grown with for so long. Pictures of the recent camp in March '07.

I miss you badly.

Love to H.

Sayonara~

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 02:08
  Thursday, March 22, 2007

Haiku, not

Haiku, not

Sleep.

And like no other.

Cause this time, you have someone to accompany you

To your dreams

Love to H.

Sayonara~

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 01:32
  Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Eurrrrgh... - translated as, braindeadness

Eurrrrgh... - translated as, braindeadness

Msn convo. Yes, an msn convo for a blog post. I'm | アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. ; sarah's サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ.


サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:24):
waaahh still awake?

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:24):
haha

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:25):
just felt like chatting a bit
i can sleep now actually
AND IS THAT BOA??? :P

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:25):
XP
waahh yes!

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:25):
BOA!!!!!!!!!!! *glomps*

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:25):
wahaha

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:25):
:XD
how are ya?

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:25):
fine but busy la
and why is there a baby in the house!? >_>

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:26):
*looks*
anyway
*looks at pm*

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:27):
not friends nor lovers?

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:28):
yes :3
baby? :XD
yeah anyways, yeah

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:29):
wwaaahahah

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:29):
:XD

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:30):
it's just a fitting song..
flavour of life
by hikki :3

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:31):
howre you?

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:31):
lol.
i guess i'm fine

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:32):
gd, gd

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:32):
if i were given one thing that i want..
i wanna go somewhere far
and walk for a long time

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:33):
haha
you dont have to go somewhere far to go 'far'
ateast thats what i think

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:33):
haha yeah
but what i envision is long, long plains, with cool breeze and sheep

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:34):
we don't have those here in singapore :3

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:37):
*poke poke*

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:37):
?

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:37):
oh, you're still there :P

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:37):
x_x
YOURE still ther
you wasnt answering me
waha

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:37):
o.O
i did
didn't I?

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:38):
or is msn once again, screwed?
XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:33):
haha
you dont have to go somewhere far to go 'far'
ateast thats what i think
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:33):
haha yeah
but what i envision is long, long plains, with cool breeze and sheep
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:34):
we don't have those here in singapore :3

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:38):
haha yeah
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says:
^_^
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says:
do you have a swing nearby?
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says:
*poke poke*

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:39):
i guess its mine
haha

| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:39):
:lol
well, yeah, there's a swing..
and, i'ld be eating an apple :P
and if possible, that other person is with me too
hmmm...

サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:39):
=]
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:40):
how are you two going?
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:40):
hahaha. you know what?
i'm starting to believe what you said before
about us meaning to be together?
heck, after all these while, we're still strong..
:nod"
:nod:
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:40):
well
yeah
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:41):
im always right.
XD
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:41):
...right :P
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:41):
wahaha
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:41):
yeah. XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:41):
waahh
she's so lucky
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:42):
she's so lucky?
I'M so lucky :XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:42):
hm
youre both lucky
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:43):
lol
okay then
XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:43):
but yeah, as i was saying
haha
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:44):
as you were saying.. XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:44):
im growing so distant from everyone im alone
haha and soon i'll be one of those old ladies who has 50 cats
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:44):
lol, cmon
no way
you feel that way huh?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:45):
yup, haha
i dont even talk anymore its so strange
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:45):
o.o
you need to be like me
go someplace far away
take the mind off
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:45):
im not allowed out
XD
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:46):
dang
well if you can
relax and bring yourself out of the world... sorta
ease your mind
and if possible, whereever you are, there should be sheep
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:46):
RAWR
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:46):
.. okay kidding :P
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:46):
haha
i lvoe sheep
and theres quite a few farms nearby
haha
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:46):
:lol
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:47):
i want sheep too
uhm. maybe just eating grass in the distance
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:47):
=p
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:47):
yeah..
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:47):
aww
now you definately should come here
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:47):
:?
lol
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:47):
we can waallkk together and throw apples at yoouu
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:47):
lol?
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:48):
i'll make the sheep chase you :P
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:48):
>< | アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:48): okay, okay :XD サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:48): i'll get the chicken | アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:48): okay, fine fine :P but anyways i always liked nighttime, so i envision a sunset and lots of stars then there would be firewood, tent | アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:49): and hopefully no rain >.> lol
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:49):
haha
that sounds like wales
or cornwall ^_^
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:49):
waaaaalessss....
coooornwaaaalllllll...
what about scotland? :3
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:50):
waaaaalessss....
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:50):
okays, fine, wales :P
there's still sheep, right?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:50):
course
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:50):
that's fabulous
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:51):
i think we can sleep quite well.. but if we can't , the sheep better get to work
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:51):
=]
so its decided
you will coommee
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:52):
uhm
provided we have the resources
and cookies?
:P
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:53):
but yeah..
i think that would be great
especially the stars part
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:53):
im missing something
x_x
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:53):
what?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:53):
im lost
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:54):
not enough badgers?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:54):
did you say something after uhm?
lol
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:54):
:badg
oh
dang, msn is screwed
don't worry, i mentioned something about needing cookies for the dream thing :P
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:54):
oh
haha
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:55):
yeah. heh XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:55):
ive never been on camp before though
waha
coul dbe my first time
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:55):
lol, sheesh
what happens if you're in the middle of the forest? :XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:56):
well i hope i wont go in one?
hahaha
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:56):
okay, fine :P
hahaha
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:56):
heck
i even managed to forget how to use a compass
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:56):
omG lol
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:57):
rly?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:57):
yeah...
^^;
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:57):
:XD sarah, sarah...
:P
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:58):
is your pm directing to anyone in particular?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:58):
hmm, yeah you could say so
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:59):
two of you going okay?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (03:59):
haha
we're fine
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (03:59):
glad to hear it :^^
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:00):
haha
thanks i guess
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:01):
wah wah waahaha
guess what?
i can finall play yui's tokyo and the guitar
^____^
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:02):
:!
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:02):
=p
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:02):
omg you must send in a recording and i wanna listen fooooooooo
:Xd
:XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:02):
wahaha
sure
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:02):
thanks :XD
oh yeah. when's your birthday?
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:03):
january 2
why?
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:04):
okays, haha
naah just asking :^^
anyways
it's really nice chatting with ya
XD therefore, i'm posting this convo to my blog.
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:05):
XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:05):
huh?
oh?
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:05):
XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:05):
oh okaee
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:05):
hahaha
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:05):
dont forget the sheeps
they ruullee
wahaha
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:05):
SHEEPS RAWK ROFLZ
yeah, so anyways
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:06):
gotta go :XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:06):
okae
sweet dreams
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:06):
thanks again dudette
sweet dreams to you too
*hugs*
:XD
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:06):
thankyeess >3
| アンジェラス ラプタ | I was once told, that any chain is freely worn, and you are enslaved to them because you allow it. says (04:07):
don't forget the cookies XD
okay okay, byee
サーラ♥ time of your life``グレープ says (04:07):
(bye)



Love to H.

Sayonara~

Edit: Spacing them out for your ease in reading. But I got tired halfway, so maybe next time. And damn mosquitoes...

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 03:42
  Monday, March 12, 2007

All your cookies are belong to me

All your cookies are belong to me

Yay.

It's like, 4.22 AM in the morning, and I've not slept.

Thing is, I have a camp today. Yay.

After dropping the stuff, gonna head to TP for the workshop thing.

Hopefully. Lol.

And damn, I've not finished with the prep.

Hm.

Dreams are getting weird again.

Saw a few people I actually didn't hope/expect to see.

But the dreams ended without conflict. So... yeah...

I think I shall take a nap now.

Thanks for all who were concerned.

I want to ask a big voice (or maybe God himself) of what I should do. It's more of a rhetorical question, but at the same time I wanted an answer, so dearly.

I'm tired of making decisions. I just wanted to follow instructions. No more decisions. No more making up of the mind.

Then, of course, there was no answer. Rhetorical question.

Sleep.

Sayonara~

And I still love you so.

PS: Camp till Wednesday. And you know me, I'm gonna drink a full cup of coffee once I head home from camp. And sleep after that.

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 04:22
  Sunday, March 11, 2007

The cell that never rings

The cell that never rings

Like as usual. Empty night, save the rushing cars past the highway (The Damned Highway) right next to my home. Shirtless is fine, with the wind fabricated from the nearby fan. Not much of the night left, daybreak soon.

If a relationship is so hard to maintain, it hurts, what do you do?

I've a feeling that if I blog down what is inside, I've a feeling I can resolve this puzzle.

But it is this resolution I'm afraid of.

Cause it means that I'm not... again.

And it's just. Hard.

There is empty within but I don't know what to do about it.

There is nothing in empty pleasures but in the end the gaping hole extends.

I'm glad to have met this person. In a way she resembled her in a lot of ways, but she's she in her special way. Talking to her is a nice feel, it helps to sort out the things in my head.

Now I'm with my own self again, and I'm left with the usual hauntings. Which I don't know if it ever will go, near one day.

There is absolutely nothing I can do.

Nothing.

So... what comes to here now?

Sayonara~

And I still love you.

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 05:36
  Wednesday, March 07, 2007

All the zzz's

All the zzz's

I love my dreams.

I get them practically every night. Even during most naps, only, they're not as developed, so to speak, as a full sleep moment.

And all my dreams are crazy.

And they can be scary too.

Scary in the sense where you die in your dreams.

And it feels so real. You have to force yourself to consciousness, out of the dream.

Those moments are scary.

But sometimes they're neat too.

Like leaping great bounds, or being something completely different.

Example was when I dreamt I was... uhm, Trinity. From the Matrix.

Yes I know weird. I became a girl. Lol. Ahem. =_=

But, I was able to do kool matrix moves.

Oh, and did I mention my dreams are sometimes lucid dreams?

Meaning,

I have absolute control over myself during the dreams themselves.

I remember a few lucid dreams. There was one where I was Neo... you can figure the rest.

Then I remember I was a kangaroo. I was leaping here and there, and I landed on a road. Just before a truck hit me =_= yes I died. Then I woke up.

Hmmm.

The most scariest of dreams would be the scary ones. The ones where you can't wake up until you face the dream, and made worst if it's a scary lucid dream. You don't wanna move, but you have to, otherwise, nothing happens. Or something might happen. Either way, you might or might not be taken in by the Big Bad, and either way they are horrible choices.

I'm only able to recall a few of those dreams. And there was one, where I remember quite clearly.

I was in a diner, a run down Western-influenced designed thing. A lot of occupants were there. I was sitting by one of the seats next to the windows, and I was looking towards the bar section.

I dared not move, nor breath, cause it was full of zombies. Somehow they have not noticed me.

Then somehow or another, I made a mistake, of what, I can't remember. But one of the zonbies start to move.

Then my entire vision got black. And in my field of vision, directly ahead of me, blacker than black, stood this guy, with such evil aura. I was personally afraid. And I was afraid that person might notice me, though I can't see who it was, his back was facing me.

Then he turned.

I was afraid. And I saw the face of the evil guy.

It was Snyder.

Then, I woke up. And I laughed.

HAH SNYDER.

And I went back to sleep, light-hearted.

Love to H.

Sayonara~

PS: I miss her. A lot.

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 02:42
  Tuesday, March 06, 2007

The Baskets, them

The Baskets, them

Once again, I forgot my password to my Blogger account, and I had to reset my gmail email password. Haha.

School is over. Waiting for the definitive supp paper, WAD.

I hope I did okay with the other subjects. No D this time?

Been active in qRO. Joined a guild. And participated in the guildwars event.

AND WE CLAIMED A CASTLE YAY

Tyco me, I died pretty much often, but hey I'm a newbie to that anyways.

Granado Espada, another game. It's really good. I like the AI and interface. Not much different from RO's battlemode.

Lol, let the AI do the fighting for you.

But of course, I'll stick with qRO :P

What else.

Oh yeah. Hope to head to Malaysia some weekend, and crash Hafiz's place there.

And we're gonna play Buffy cards too. Lol.

Maybe rent a Buffy and/or Angel DVD as well. See how it goes.

See, I don't like to blog when I don't have the mood.

Then again I've not got the mood to blog for a long time...

Love to H.

Sayonara~

Edit: Forgot the topic title tag. Haha.

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angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 01:57
 
angelusraptor
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