What lies within..

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 00:58

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Not quite there yet not just ordinary

Not quite there yet not just ordinary

That's the way we describe things these look

There's nothing ordinary about all this

But we're not there yet; no

It's okay

Takes time anyways

Would it take Michael years to figure

How the art is to be done?

Even then I don't think I'm just letting go

No; never never

Not just like that

River peace no longer what it seems

Deeper meaning unlike that of the yesteryears

It's a peace, but not, at the same time

The tides are coming

The tides are coming

You should be afraid; But you're not

Just knowing

You've got a lot to lose and you're really afraid

But it's okay

What matters is still close with you

It's okay

PS: I can't believe it's late November already... hm.

Later guys.

Love you, H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 02:28

Friday, November 24, 2006

No more goodbyes; We knew all along

No more goodbyes; We knew all along

Hm. It's been a long time since I've made a blog post proper.

So, what's new in life?

I'll be honest here. I can see the tides coming. Heavy, heavy blows. But, deep in the core I'm just so happy I can cry tears out. And it's only the beginning, you know?

I dearly hope we share the same feelings too.

I'm seriously unsure if I want to participate in this year's NCO camp. I really don't know. Part of me is goona avoid it like a plague, another wants to be involved, wanna get to know the cadets, the new faces, and the faces of whom shall grow and continue to support Zone 1.

I really don't know. I don't want to answer that, at least not now.

(But whatever it is, as long as I'm in MSN around one each morning, I'm fine with anything, hehe.)

Hmm. Looks like my plans for the new handphone is blown. Guess I have to start from scratch to get that k700i. Lol. But, at least I hope, in the coming semester break I'll have my cousin to accompany in my first real part-time job experience. Ya rly, I've never done part-time. Tis sad, no?

I've got work to do, yet I'm feeling a great deal of inertia to get it done. Would it be stress? Perhaps. Nothing to stress too much, but it's hindering. If you know what I mean.

2.22. Should I stay? Or should I go...

Oops. Guilty sitting and stoning too long. Lol.

Later guys.

Love you, H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 02:18

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Just so deep

Just so deep

For him.

For her.

Love you, H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 02:23

Monday, November 20, 2006

Blarrgh! Lol, nice Angel snippets in Youtube.

Blarrgh! Lol, nice Angel snippets in Youtube.

Okay, quick post.

I feel so useless. Not in a really bad way...

I so want to pour it all out, but I know for your sake I won't say anything about it. Because anyone can be here, hm.

Sigh. Hope you're doing fine ^ ^

Love you, H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 00:59

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever told me. Ever.

That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever told me. Ever.

You see, it's a blogging lapse. I blog every few days, and not everyday. Haha. You know how my writing style goes - not the accounting of what happens in the day (at least not specifically), but the narrative of an aspect of the day. Things just happen, and sometimes I write about them.

What does your heart speak?

This, I asked someone tonight. The words to follow were the sweetest things I've ever heard.

It's just amazing. Being honest with self, and with others, and you can see how you can move hearts with your own.

I know, crappy post. Blog lapse, haha. Perhaps next time. I really just wanted to chip in, because EVERYONE'S chipping in a good post. Lol.

PS: Watch Bones and Angel youtube for those mystery-detective-theme fans - it's a sure great hit! Film noir in a roll. Muha.

Later guys.

Love you, H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 01:56

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Head pounding, and again, with the questions; But all of a sudden, they don't matter

Head pounding, and again, with the questions;
But all of a sudden, they don't matter

As quickly as it came, it's the end of the third week of the semester. Kinda too fast for my liking. I'm feeling I'm looking down my grave pretty soon, lol. But it's okay even then - as long as I'm old and... *secret wish thing* teehee.

So - hello world. Getting back to school is pretty awesome, in some sense. The teachers this round are pretty great too, or at least people I would be agreeable on. I do know I have to at least work my ass off to push my grades as high as possible. Time's running out with only less than three semesters running. The ultimate target - GPA of three, at least. Wish to call out to my friends to help me, encourage me to that spot. It's more important to me now than ever before.

As said, I have drive. ;)

Hanging out with the old crowd is awesome, especially with those close buddies whom you've grown close to. But it does make me think of my really old friends. We barely get to meet nowadays - and a Hari Raya gathering is so hard to organise. Conflicts in schedule, and stuff. Things get in the way, and we're just drifting apart. But, the fond memories, they're still there. Memories can be forgotten, but never lost to the heart. Because once cleaved they remain there forever.

I'm just hoping I can meet the old boys again. Vasant, Terror T, Freeze, Chan Xing and Sharrifuddin. The old lot of us, back one time, simple tea or eat-out occassion. Chill like the old times.

That aside.

I just want to say how much I feel for this person. Really. And, a lot. You know who you are - and given, I'd shout your name at the top of the world.

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, - I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! - and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

XLIII, Sonnets of the Portugese;
Browning, Elizabeth Barrette

Love you, H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 23:05

Thursday, November 09, 2006

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be; And I don't wanna go home right now

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be;
And I don't wanna go home right now

Hun. Just dance with me.

I'm so screwed - ever since dinner I've really just stoned in front of my computer. I've got progress, but compared to what I can achieve for the day, this is pathetic.

Haha. It's just... there's *someone* in my mind constantly. And then I found Goo Goo Dolls' Iris. Which, is really not helping, considering I'm stoning more.

Should get going now. Gonna nuke the fever.

Damn, Law tutorial unfinished. Proposal unfinished too. Hmm... then again, I'm the Certified Evil. Should go through.

Love you, H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 01:05

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Me and Garfield went to the restaurant

Me and Garfield went to the restaurant

What a GREAT weight lifted off my chest. Thanks guys.

Sheesh. I have not been exercising. Knock-it down, Farhan, a one two three.

But, one thing I'm fond of, is all the sleep I've been catching up on. Oh, GLORIOUS sleep, hehe. A long stretch the night before, a nap here, few winks there. I'm a cat now, and no do not fix me tuna on the kitty plate. Lasagne, please =D

I'm not sure, I simply like the lasagne in the IT School canteen. Marvellous, though I used to hate it previously. Change in the tastebuds, or maybe I've mastered a way to enjoy it and not puke like last time. No, I did not, but the feeling was there. Sick.

Which automatically leads to - I really really need to learn how to cook (bake, actually) lasagne. If I'm gonna enjoy it this much I really should learn how to have it as dinner at home, lol. I know it's a baking process and there's layers and layers of.... something, involved. Gah, I should look up the recipie.

Is it cheese? Lol. I enjoy eating the thing I'm not entirely sure what it comprises of.

And there's the other part, I've never baked anything in my life. Maybe cookies when I was really young, but that was ages ago. It's time I get to learn how to bake stuff too. Maybe I'll get into cookies real soon, eh? Heh heh heh. But in all honesty, I've no idea how to work that microwave. Worse person for advice, Mr Bean.

Maybe when I get my own apartment. I've a feeling I could (no, WOULD) /nukedabastard Da Kitchen if i ever tried baking without supervision. I don't want to burn the stove :P

Haha, just kidding. I'm sure, perhaps in a semester break or two. Come to think of it, there's not much semester breaks left. Afterwhich, NS.

Le gaspth! Are you ready for NS?!

Lol. Takes time. I'm glad I'm into some exercise at least. There's a different reason to it too. No, actually more of drive. I've got drive, people. Hahaha.

Garfield, look what you did to me - I'm addicted to lasagne :P

Anyways. Sleep, early morning. Hoping to see someone there.

Later people.

Love to H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 00:58

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Distance

Distance

Firstly, thanks Vin.

You know, I just so wish, there's a clear communication between us. It's antagonizing when we just can't communicate as much as we want to. Just so wish everything might tone down for you.. and after that, you can help make things better, so we can be together more. It'll take time... but I'm willing to wait.

After I pray, I say a prayer. That everything would be better. That all would be alright.

I'm just so wishing to hear from her soon.

In the weekends I can rest... but it's not like the weekdays.

How I wish I can see you. To meet you, and get to know you. Let you see me, yes, I am flawed, but to see ME. How I want us to be together, and to stuff together. Hang out, chill out, Starbucks after a long day, traditional movie-dinner thing, or some crazy restaurant whose name I can't pronounce, karate practice sessions together, showing you the corp, showing you my friends, showing you the world I live in.

And letting you know me. KNOW me, you know?

Maybe a few years... maybe more.

Uhm, an at-this-moment update...

SHE'S HERE!

Haha.

Later people.

Love to H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 05:06

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

It's an (edited - not so) crappy blog post

It's an ( edited - not so ) crappy blog post

I'm just sitting here, with some work to do, but not moving to complete them as of yet. As usual. Haha.

Naah, I'm just feeling... sigh. Like, a happy/sad/confused/excited sigh. Generally confused. Nothing wrong, but...

It's powerful, you know?

I'm so so glad. I'm happy to be feeling as I am right now. It's a joy feel, haha.

And yes, I didn't have school earlier. My timetable slot for Wednesdays is empty. CLEAN. And I slept for most of the mornings, quite obviously XD

It's already night, and I can't wait for midnight. She know what I refer to. And at the same time... midnight means I'll have to complete the Media Law assignment.

Gah, I better finish it now >.< lol

... okay I know. Crappy blog post. Maybe if I'm motivated I'll blog something later. If. XD

Love to H.

Edit:

For that instant, the feeling hit me - and how I long to show more, for only words could mean so much.

And, you're wrong Hannah - I do, and more than you XD

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 22:17

Hahaha

Hahaha

One day, I might just explode. The good way that is.

Might be blogging later. I have no school!! Huzzah!

Later people.

Love to H.

Sayonara~

angelus_raptor left bulletshell casings at 02:30